But for a while, we had this thing where everytime one of us did ANYTHING around the house, we needed the other person to acknowledge it and be thankful and impressed. And ignored mess just grows. And that is not to say he never helps — because he does. If our kitchen is a disaster and ignored for days on end, my husband will never put anything back or clean anything up. I refuse to create arguments out of housework, I know first hand how damaging that is.
So I do what I can, and without saying anything it signals to my husband to help out a little more too. I thank him, I express how nice it is to have a clean kitchen, I point out how quick and easy it is when we both work on it, and cover him with hugs and kisses.
Wrap it up in positivity. For my own sake and that of my family. I will take almost anything over Laundry and dishes for instance. Luckily I have housemates who I can share chores with.
I should mention that I am a guy and love cooking, sweeping, and cleaning the bathroom yes you heard that right so it is a bit odd when divvying up chores. I feel like a cleaner place helps me paint and I like painting. I hear ya. Doing the dishes is almost therapeutic. Gives you a few minutes alone to think and do something satisfying at your own pace. Now, we only have small throw rugs that can be shaken out and tossed in the washing machine.
I thought I was the only one who hated vacumming. Dusting, cooking, bathrooms, organizing, scrubbing gunk out of the bottom of the fridge, I got that! Is that the first step? That is totally the first step. I still get resentful about deep cleaning, but the daily chores and tidying?
Serene and soothing to me now. No matter what. I hate it. I also hate cleaning our basement. When I am by myself, I can clean all the live long day. Having a laminated chore sheet has helped.
We can check things off if we do them slowly over the week, and also keep track of who did what so neither my husband or I are cleaning the bathrooms two weeks in a row. I just enjoy being in a clean house with food already purchased and meals planned out. That way you can sit back, cook dinner, and relax. I love the spaceship reframe! My partner and I both grumble about cleaning especially dishes since we lost our dishwasher , but maybe if we pretended we were Wash and Kaylee it would make things easier.
I do find that I have a higher standard of cleanliness than he does, which can lead to me feeling resentful. I read that and now I am all excited to go clean and get a freaking break! I am going to have the cleanest house ever! Tell me, what age did this effect kick in? Especially if it means closets. Closer to 3 for my kid. Now he has 2 choices when I clean…clean up your toys, or play with them! Lists are hugely helpful to me.
I jot down a handful of things I want to get accomplished, and crossing them off feels weirdly satisfying! I hate that. I feel you about starting to like chores. I still hate the last bit of dishes that are right before bed as I have to do them all by hand but throughout the day they give a nice time to mellow out. I guess give your brain a time to not really have to think hard about anything… meditation if you will?
It sounds crazy but it is part of Zen buddhism… right? Great article!! I like cleaning. I find it therapeutic! Each product we feature has been independently selected and reviewed by our editorial team. If you make a purchase using the links included, we may earn commission.
Save FB Tweet More. Cabinets and counters after makeover. Since spring officially marks the arrival of cleaning season in our books, we went to Real Simple Facebook fans and asked them if they liked to clean. The surprising results?
We took those reasons and went to neat freaks and experts to find out what it is about running the dishwasher and folding the laundry that produces such a sense of contentment. Start Slideshow. Credit: Thomas Loof. Clean white bathroom. Credit: Monica Buck. Stove and wooden spoons. Credit: Mikkel Vang. Cleaning spray with flowers, sponge, and cloth. Now check your email to download your checklist. Think positively about your cleaning activities. This part is a big deal!! I always hated cleaning, felt it was a waste of time and like I said before, I felt bad asking my husband to clean as well.
I felt like it was admitting I wasn't capable and in some ways failing in my "wifely duties. But that added to my issues. The more I thought "I hate cleaning, I'm not even good at it.
As I learned to enforce the weekly cleaning with myself as well as the kids , I noticed, I enjoyed the outcome. I learned to ask my husband to take charge of certain areas or rooms and he happily obliged.
For me, I had to learn how to communicate what I wanted on "house cleaning day" instead of assuming he knew. He doesn't care as much about the state of the house as I do, so he wouldn't notice things that drove me nuts: like clutter collecting on the piano.
He doesn't have a problem taking care of it, he just never cared about it. Now that he knows it's important to me, he'll chip in and put things away. I began to look forward to Saturdays because I knew the house would be pretty. I learned to say to myself "I enjoy cleaning on Saturdays! I often invited people over for Saturday afternoon or evening get-togethers, because I knew the house would be something I was proud of.
And now, after a few years of having that weekly cleaning time in place, I'm excited to say that I wake up on Saturdays eager to clean. I find fun music, the kids and I race to get things done. And often times, the teens will end up talking to me while we work together. It doesn't. But for most people, the best time to do this weekly cleaning is at the beginning of your "weekend," regardless of what day it is. Hi there! This actually may help me!
My house is passable but it spirals out of control weekly. Have a lovely day. Thank you! I look forward to implementing some of these! I do not have children yet, and it is only my husband and I, but with two full time jobs and starting our own side business and 8 brothers and sisters with families and parties, it gets chaotic and drop ins and babysitting is frequent!! I look forward to talking to my husband tonight and starting to do the 10 minute clean up every morning and night!
You nailed it! The problem is, I am embarrassed by how dirty I know the house is. Thanks for encouraging us all to get the right mindset and tackle our homes with gusto. I grew up with the same habit in my house, except we all worked together on the same room, except for certain exceptions. It is hard for me to dedicate Saturdays for cleaning, since my little ones are small.
So I break down my duties daily to the first hour or two of the morning, so I can start the day with my house in order. But I must agree that the seed was planted as a child on Saturday mornings.
I would highly recommend the practice for character building. Thanks I really thank this gave me the mind set I need. I am Soo excited to give it a try. As women we have a tendency to downplay the need for self-care. Things like hobbies, or watching Opra are simple examples of ways we can enrich our personal growth and long term happiness.
I have had friends come over to my house and thank me for NOT gathering the clutter and shoving it into a bedroom and they could feel normal or less guilty. Maybe I have no shame. But I do know where I was at that point in my life, and I would love to say that it was self-care… But that would be a lie. I purposely filled my days with everything except taking care of my home. For a while I did have a Saturday morning cleaning session where the kids all had jobs and it worked pretty well.
We always have trouble getting back to it after a vacation. Thanks for the encouragement! I feel like you were describing me!
I started trying this because it was simple and doable and now I love it. Also I used to hate doing dishes and then I decided to time myself one day to see how long it took to do the dishes. It only took 5 minutes to unload and load the dishwasher. After I realized it only took me five minutes I stopped putting it off and just got it done. After I had my third child my husband had a cleaning lady come to our house. She did a great job but she was there for hours!
Then we found a cleaning service where they send four people to your house for an hour. They worked quickly and each had their own jobs. It was so nice and it was done quickly and my home looked wonderful when they left I also worked for an hour before they came but that was cleaning up all the toys and clutter so they COULD clean! This is an interesting article. I did not learn much about cleaning growing up because by the time I got home from school everything was done.
With less clutter is so so much easier for the children to help with the cleaning, hard to dust well when you need to move a bunch of stuff.
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